LETS CHANGE IT .... I intend to bring positive change. I am vocal about gender equality. Most of my articles will be based on real life incident, inspirational and practical. I am a legal professional and I love to cook, eat, bake. I like listening to English and Bengali songs. I like to read books and watch out of the box movies. You are most welcome to suggest your views on comment section under each article. Thank you.
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
Saturday, April 4, 2015
LETS CHANGE IT.....: Marriage Journey (Part I)
LETS CHANGE IT.....: Marriage Journey (Part I): Let us talk about Arrange marriage… Marriages are made in heaven and celebrated on earth – Anonymous (quoted ...
Marriage Journey (Part I)
Let us talk about Arrange marriage…
Marriages
are made in heaven and celebrated on earth –
Anonymous (quoted since ages)
In
India, we have different states, religions, caste etc. Here, Marriage is
between two families. When it comes to marriage, you have relatives who turn
out to be your biggest enemy. Friends become your savior by advising on how to
handle such situations. Also, it depends on what category your friends falls
into. Married or Unmarried. It is obvious married friend will drag you to her
side and unmarried (single) will give you tips/advantages of being single. The
most dangerous are unmarried who in a relationship. They are already struggling
for their own marriage and if you go asking for advise, you may simply get a
negative feedback if you are planning to opt for arrange marriage. So going to
them is a bad option. However, if you are in love already, no harm seeking
their advice. In fact one can even approach friends who already had love
marriage (Successful). Well that’s not all, love marriages are in trend now.
People are not interested to know to whom you are marrying to, rather they want
to know whether its love or arranged. Irony of life!
Coming
to the concept of arranged marriage, well it’s a roller coaster ride for a girl
as well as the boy. Initial step is to search, lots of time alliances are
matched in some relatives wedding itself. However, we have paid matrimonial sites too and believe me they are genuine (not
all). (Few matrimonial sites offer free
subscription to beautiful females too). Parents insist on having a
portfolio done from good photographers (ask
them to pay for Good pictures too). I believe 50% of the readers reading
this article must have got their portfolio done. No shame to admit. I am one of
them (My father paid). Well,
selection of the right candidate becomes difficult. It is very difficult than
searching a job. After short listing the candidate (if and only if you are lucky), meeting is the next step. Before
that background check is must. There are profiles with fake identity too. So
beware (Caveat). First girl and boy
would meet, then meeting again (if they
really want to go ahead). Finally deciding to spend life together (only in two or three meetings?). Wait a
second, we are forgetting the elders. They play a very crucial part and their
nod is the apex of all to go ahead with the relation. Also this shows respect
for elders too. On a serious note, elders blessing is must to start a new life.
Finally
the time arrive when elders decide to meet. Usually such meetings take place at
bride house only. Sunday evenings are considered to be the best day for it (being a holiday). Girl’s family has to
make so many arrangements from sweets to snacks to cleaning the house also.
Remember each and everything is observed (even
how fast/ slow you talk). After
their arrival, girl is asked to come to meet her would be family (in case elders give green signal). This
journey isn’t simple however, it is beautiful if the partner chosen turns out
to be perfect (perfect as per individual choice).
A little adjustment from both the end will work and that doesn’t mean one have
to adjust the entire life (Keep in mind).
On
discussing about arrange marriage, one thought came to my mind. Is there any
guarantee of marriage being successful? Well, the answer will vary from person
to person. No one guarantees that. Newly wedded couples have different
perception about marriage to that who are married for more than 10 years and so
on. Also I have seen people ending up marriages after spending 30 odd years.
So, point is no one will guarantee your marriage. It is you who have to take
proper care of the relationship and decide about taking steps in each phase of
life.
Love,
Trust & Respect are the three important factors one must develop. This is
how the journey will begin. Two strangers (in case of arrange marriage) decide
to tie knots and spend their life happily ever after. Well, if it is a life
then there won’t be only happiness. Sorrow, pain, anger, fights and happiness
are all mould in package called life. There is no mantra for successful marriage; it is up to the couple how they
take it. Respect your partner (parents
too), give him all your love (am sure
he will return same love with interests), have trust on him (on yourself too). Life will be simply
amazing and try to live your life on three successful Mantras.
·
Best of luck. A new world is awaiting to welcome you – For those who are going to tie knots soon
(Arranged/ Love);
·
Don’t lose hope. All the best – For
those who are searching
P.S.: For all the lovely ladies who are
going to marry soon, please watch 27 Dresses (one of my personal favorite) before
your marriage. A Hollywood movie starring the very pretty Ms. Katherine Heigl
and the cutes Mr. James Marsden.
Stay tuned for the upcoming article… All about courtship :P
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
Tribute to our World…Maa
Tribute to our World…Maa
Volume I: My Mother, My World!
Mom is the world. Mother and world are interlinked together.
Since our childhood we know only one person (some are not that fortunate too); and that one person is our
mother. She cuddles us, cares for us and do what not thing just to make sure
her child is sleeping peacefully or playing happily and etc...
What made me write this article? My Mother offcourse!!! Hold
on! Not only my mother but my nephews mother too, my friends Mom, my colleagues
Mom, my neighbours Mother and all the mothers
who are existing or have existed in the universe.
One
morning I left as usual for work and I kept walking until a lady
came running to me asking for change of 50 Rupees. She must be in her early 40s
and looked tired, disgusted. I quickly removed my wallet digging into my handbag in hurry and before I could
count exact 5 notes of 10 each, she flipped out the money impatiently and exchanged the 50
rupee note on my other hand. I didn’t bother to see what she was upto as I was
really running late to catch the train. Fortunately, I got the train and the
morning incident vanished from my thoughts. In the office, while I was
checking mails, that unusual face kept coming to and fro on my mind. I tried
concentrating on work rather then thinking about that lady, who was she? No one! I said to myself.
It was almost 9 pm when I returned back home, I was walking
towards my resident compound and there I could see that lady again. She was
standing there with the same tired and disgusted expression. I decided not to
look there and kept walking with my head down. She followed me and I started
walking faster than her. She began taking big steps to match mine and I started running. She
decided to run and I could do nothing but run more faster and there I was hit
by the huge iron gate of my society compound. She came for the rescue before I
could collapse. Madam? Madam? She was shouting with a worried tone. The moment
it got hit on my forehead, I could only see a big bulb of 100 watts in front of
my eyes, a rare blur version of a bulb.
I responded to that lady’s voice as my eyes were closed for
that very moment. She helped me to get up and open my eyes. On regaining
consciousness, my question was straight to her as to why was she following me?
Madam, I wanted to say you thank you for the morning. If you would have not
helped me, my son would have gone to school without tiffin and I could not see
that. No mother would want, I said to myself. I nodded my head and smiled.
It was little strange for me but my thoughts and mind were
not in a situation to investigate further. I will leave, thank you for the
help..ummm’ I said to that lady and began walking towards the entrance of my apartment. Tanu..my name
is Tanu and I stay there (she points
towards the society adjacent to my society which has 20 buildings) and she
walked towards it.
Next morning I could not go to office due to my headache and
I decided to sleep more. The doorbell rings and I get to see the time; its 2 PM
in the afternoon and I rushed to open the door. Hello, my name is Ashee Patel
and I stay in the next society. I said ‘Ok. How may I help you? (confused and
half asleep)
The other you had met my mom and let me tell you she is the
best Mother in this world’ Ashee speaks almost in tears.
I quickly manage to hand over the tissues to her and she
continues…
Really sorry for my moms behaviour’ she speaks again.
I am totally confused.
Will you please stop crying and tell me why are you sorry? I am at home on my
sick leave so please you better leave.
My mother is not educated, a very simple lady with good
heart and she recently shifted here from my native, Baroda, Gujarat. Lately,
she behaves absurd sometimes but that doesn’t mean she has no one to take care
of. I have not seen my mother but her since I have been growing up. My chachi
says she would not love me as the moment she gives birth to her own child. But you
know what? I seriously don’t, but please
go on… m listening.
I want to give her so much of love and respect that she doesn’t
realizes that I am her step daughter. Whatever she is doing for me is
absolutely commendable and she is amazingly sweet. I have never seen the person
who gave me birth neither my father has shown me any of her picture. I believe
he did this for my better tomorrow; for our better tomorrow and am glad that he
did.
I don’t know why I told you this but I would never like someone
laughing back at my mother’ she said in a stern voice. My mom is my world and I
love her’ she sings. I was here because I have seen you talking with my mother.
I am so amazed that you shared your story with me and you
know what you are the world’s best daughter. I am sure she must be very proud
of you’ I happily told her.
Ashee took my leave
and quickly left for her home. She had directly come from school to my place to
meet me and share her story. More than that she wanted to tell me how much she
loves and cares about her. A little girl who is just 8 years old, came to me
just to say that I should behave with her mother. Ashee might misunderstood me
with other people. She thought I think the same way as other do about her mom.
Ashee’s innocence say it all. A child do not
know the difference between step mother and real one and am glad that they
do not know. I wish all of us think the same way as Ashee does… with a pure
heart.
P.S.: Stay tuned.
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
The Empty Relationship
THE EMPTY RELATIONSHIP …
Love is in the air
… is doing gaga over peoples face book, BBM and whats app status.
Do they really know what love is? Well, it depends on person
to person. For some it is attraction, some finds physical pleasure while many of
them just love because they need a companion to crave on and have the benefit of.
On the other hand, very few are there who actually welcomes the pain and
beautiful feeling of love to cherish their life.
Love can only happen
between two opposite individuals.
Answer to it remains a big question mark. Let us find a way...
It can be among two opposite gender friends and it can be
between a mother-son or father-daughter or siblings too.
Love has no definition; neither has it had any limitations
to stop.
Today we are
living in material and practical world.
The scenario is different now. So
far so good is hardly seen and if seen whether it will become successful is
doubtful every time. Nobody thinks of
having a sustained relationship, they are fine even if their partner terminate
the agreement of love.
For instance,
college babies are immature when they choose a wrong person however; they are
called as geeks and nerds if they do not have one partner (pattern of college
life)
Definition of love has become very unrealistic these days.
Nobody cares whether your partner loves you or not. They only care about their
security and safety (hidden fact).
Sometimes I feel
like going back to the olden days where raj kapoor can be seen singing pyaar hua ikraar hua with nargis as well
one can notice how shammi kapoor expresses his grievances to sadhana in dil ke zharoko me tujhko bithaake …. Those
were the beautiful songs with meaning and perfect time picturised in the movie
and so people of that time have cherished their memories and happiness with these
songs.
Today, it has
changed. Movies are still source of
entertainment but the entertainment part has been treasured so much that even
Vidya Balan had to commit in one of her movies that entertainment rocks!
Relationship has become the empty castle of love where anybody can enter and
exit without any concern. Breakups and patch ups are in trend. Bollywood plays
a very important role in encouraging youngsters, no offence made as such. People
are bound to get attracted to what is not good. Initially, love dances all over
you and slowly but gradually you get distracted with the terms and conditions (ye nai karna, who nahi karna, jaanu ye,
jaanu who----Period!)
All the best to those who are in a
steady relationship and good luck (try your luck even harder) to those who just
experienced a breakup.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
It was just like an other day of my life as I
was speculating something special has to happen.
Surprisingly my cell beeps,
his message. Splendid!
I was aware of the fact, he
would some day. Friends teasing were limited until he messaged. It got worsed
as it all got public.
We don’t care!!!!! (We said to each other and continued to remain together)
Bad mouths came with good
mouths. Few hearts were happy to see us together while many went outrageous.
I simply knew what I wanted at that moment.
It was he…
Wasn’t aware whether it was love,
affection, or attraction... whatever it may be, I was happy at that moment
Memories of him……. an hour spend with him
seemed a whole life sometimes it would flash like a minute. I myself was
CONFUSED about my status with him a life.
May be I never wanted to
confess or may be he always wanted me to confess 1st.
Love comes with terms conditions of which
both we were unaware and it took us very far…. (Before entering into agreement of love, both the parties are
requested to read all the terms and conditions as it are binding on both the
parties after execution).
MY WORLD OF his…..
Absolutely impossible to forget
the aroma coming out of him, it makes me insane sometimes. Hate those who used
to be around him always. Told you terms and conditions.
An hour spend with him was always memorable
for me…movie hall or college cafeteria or may be the wait for the train at
railway platform…ahh…those were the dazzling flash which I urge for.
moment spent is nowhere to be found….nowadays
my heart pumps nevertheless my soul is somewhere in the
cafeteria or just about the platform waiting to have glance of those beautiful
memories which I had once enjoyed and now am craving it for ……
Only 4u…I went away…leaving my
soul in the cafeteria….in the college campus…thanks for those lovely 5 star treats,
calling me for hours, and occasionally waiting for me…. I did only4u…..
Friday, November 23, 2012
MAKING OF MODERN ANAND
MAKING OF MODERN ANAND
I watched ANAND movie,
the day after Rajesh khanna died. Old movies make me energetic and after
watching anand, I smiled and cried simultaneously (hard to do so in real). It
was midnight, the movie got over and I never thought I would take up pen and
pencil instead of lying on bed hiding myself under quilt. Actually, I searched
for pen, paper and started writing my experience on it.
Zindagi...... kaise hai paheli haaaye …kabhi ye hasaaein,
kabhi ye rulaae (my facebook status the day he died) has very true meaning in each lyrics. Even kahin
door jab din dhal jaae is a wonderful all time favorite song. If given a
chance, I will buy the copyrights of it (although
many are there in queue) and convert
it into a wonderful tale. While, I watched the movie long back in my
childhood, some 10 years ago. This time I had excellent opportunity of watching
the second half (equally painful).
It gives a special message to all humans, to believe in
yourself and live life to the fullest (negativity
ignored). Anand knows how to enjoy life and make friends with anyone who is
passing by the roadside. He knew the secret of how to make the remaining days
of his life the worth living. The story is about a man (who suffers from cancer and comes to Mumbai to meet his friend and live
the remaining days of his life to the fullest) and here he meets babu
moshaae (dr.baneerjee, who 1st
shares a doctor patient relationship with anand but later he becomes his friend
and at the end he even manages to get some homeopathic medicine just to save
anand’s life).
In the movie,
Tape recorder was introduced, (today
mobile phones do have all functions)
which played an immense role from start until the end. Even I thought of buying
one to record lovely voice of my near and dear ones. The moment you miss them,
you ON the recorder and they are with you.
Sometimes I do really feel the olden era was very calm, quite and
beautiful place to live ( but never
thought , even people back then could suffer from cancer )
The message
received is simple yet powerful. When you know …you or your dear one is
counting the last few days of his/her life, just make those days the most
memorable days of their entire life. Even if death comes, you have no regrets
to it. Make those days simply worth living and loving. Be a part of their bliss
(babu moshaae did) and do not make
them gloomy. Stop sympathizing with them as an alternative be in love with them.
Create a history, be the real life anand getting inspired by reel life and not only anand but also we need babu moshaae’s
too. LET US CHANGE IT ….
Instead of shedding
tears, blow the air of happiness. Do not give your shoulder to cry but hold
their hands and take them out …let them enjoy the fresh air, the positivity;
make them feel the aroma outside. They can at least die happily.
The last scene (most of us cried watching this scene)…
Anand
cried before dying, he does not want to die without meeting dr.banerjee (babu moshaae), who went to take
homeopathic medicine from one of his colleague believing it could save anand
from dying. Anand asked to play the recorder and the poetry was played (which was recorded a night before by dr.banerjee).
Told you Mr. Recorder played a very important role.
However, wait,
Today’s anand has so
much of stress and tension with him. Even if he knows he is going to die, he
becomes more anxious. More burdens welcome you. Arranging finance, insurance,
spouse, kids, other family members …all this arrangement takes those remaining
days of your life and you die a stressful and tensed death.
Zindagi Badi
Honi Chahiye, Lambi Nahi Babu Moshai.'
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
SATYAMEV JAYATE: PART 2 ( OUR MOVE )
SATYAMEV JAYATE: PART 2
OUR MOVE (help the nation by helping yourselves)
Previous article was just the foundation, now it is the right time to talk about it, to do a bit commencing our part.
With reference to last Sunday’s episode i.e., 22 July 2012, it was about water.
Each one of us (even the birds and animals) know its importance. Water plays a very important part in our life … we are studying about it since our school days. Earlier we had water in plenty with us, however it is depleting nowadays.
Tears rolled down my face when I saw the pictures shown in the episode. They were all real. Circumstances have become worse and it continues to do so. Our one time holy water GANGA ji is no longer the holy water (see the pictures). People bath in the banks of river Ganga , Yamuna and so on holy rivers. They not only bath, but wash their cloths as well.
Riverbanks are too much polluted and we are the one who are doing it. Holy places like kashi, Mathura , vrindavan, Haridwar, Banaras and many more are polluted now.
We call INDIA
Are we taking it all for granted? The place where we live, we call it as our own home and we keep it clean every time. So, why not our country? Consider on it.
A small step of yours will encourage others. As it is well said, CHARITY BEGINS AT HOME ….
So let us start OUR MOVE on keeping our surrounding clean, maintenance of ponds, lakes and tube wells. Water is the important element of our life and we cannot let it go this way.
One move of your, will give confidence to your neighbors and friends. This is how you the initiative will start and reach to its aim soon.
Let the superior authority think on this. Why should we? Mind-set should be thrown out of our mind.
We should take our move, let others follow us. Gradually and little by little every one will develop into a part of it and we would achieve our aim i.e. preservation of water.
for instance, if one day you forget to carry your water bottle in office/college , recall that moment how it feels…. its terrible. Buying water from stores is not a cheap deal. Several monopoly retailers are making money by selling bisleri or any water bottle at price higher than that. You end up buying bisleri paying 2 rupees extra to the shopkeeper (you are helpless you feel). However not many of us are aware of the phone numbers which are available exactly up on the board of this shopkeepers only.
Most of the stalls in railway stations have this emergency phone number to report on high price charged by the shopkeeper. Next time you feel you are been charged more than the MRP, look around for the number, dial and report it. Water is a costly deal nowadays. So save it by making its use in an efficient manner.
Those pictures revealed in the episode were so awful. Comparing to foreign country rivers, our rivers stand nowhere. They are spotless whereas ours are contaminated. Once I saw the pictures, something really strained me. I felt helpless for sometime and could visualize the complete mismanaged organization of water.
Time to take our move. Do little for you and the society as a whole. One show like satyamev jayate can encourage us, so why can’t we avail the benefit of it .Take part in water conservation and save rainwater .Visit the satyamev jayate site and you get the details of it. How to save water and with less or no money spent.
High time friends, our move will motivate thousands of people around us and it can multiple to lacks. Out of crores of people, even if thousands do take step forward, VICTORY is all ours.
Come forward do something to save your own nation. The nation is already being corrupted now don’t let the environment fall victim of it. We have time to save it from being eradicated.
Let us unite together and make promises to ourselves to win over the evil path by spreading awareness regarding water conservation all over again.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)